Analysis of the Bumpers of Wheels on 570 KLIF (NOV, 2022 to MAY, 2024)
2023 September 30
2024 August 10

Quick Takeaways from this Analysis

· Like videos games of old, there is a fixed pattern to the bumper music of Wheels.

· The performers with the most songs used as Wheels bumper music are all white males.
This outcome lacks equity, exposing Ed Wallace’s wokeness as a thin façade.

· More than half of the songs used as Wheels bumper music are from the 1980s.

· No songs from the 2010s or later are used as Wheels bumper music.

Guide to the Bumpers of Wheels on 570 KLIF (NOV, 2022 to MAY, 2024)

The data upon which this analysis is based comes from this guide:

Bumper Guide

The most immediate use for the guide is to predict what bumpers will be heard during an upcoming broadcast of Wheels. For example, today’s bumpers (September 30, 2023) should be from the table labeled “Playlist G”. This should be handy for those following along at home.

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This presumes that Wheels does not again fumble the playlist, as the show did when “Playlist D” was played both on September 2^nd and September 9^th.

Analysis: The Performers of Songs Used as Wheels’ Bumpers

The count of unique performers found within the playlists is 175. The following word cloud presents a proportional representation of each performer’s presence within the bumpers:

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The count of unique song clips found within the playlists is 251.

The following table presents the performers who have the most songs used as a Wheels bumper. Surprisingly enough, John Couger Mellencamp (a.k.a. John Mellencamp, Johnny Cougar, and John Cougar) tops the list with seven songs. And predictably, The Beatles and the Rolling Stones tied for second with each having six songs used as bumpers.

PERFORMERS WITH MOST SONGS USED AS BUMPER MUSIC FOR KLIF WHEELS
RANK	PERFORMER	SONGS
1^st	John Cougar Mellencamp	7
2^nd (tie)	Rolling Stones	6
	The Beatles
3^rd	Bryan Adams	5
4^th (tie)	AC/DC	4
	David Bowie
	Van Halen
	ZZ Top

This list of the eight performers with the most songs used as a Wheels bumper is quite revealing, as the list includes no women or people of color. Furthermore, neither a woman nor a person of color appears amongst the next six performers who tie for the 9^th rank with three songs each. If Wallace practiced what he preached, his song selection would not be based upon the song’s merit, but based upon whether the song’s performer is inclusive of a protected class. On that basis of inclusivity, the outcome of Ed Wallace’s song selection fails on equity. Therefore, as per his own social warrior allies’ dictates, Wallace must be branded a misogynist and a racist.

Analysis: The Release Years of Songs Used as Wheels’ Bumpers

The release years of these songs also conveys another insight about the bumper music.

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As graphically depicted in the above chart, each playlist gets a fairly even distribution of release years from the set of all songs chosen to be a bumper. However, the release years of the songs selected to be a bumper heavily skews in favor of certain decades.

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Over half of songs are from the 1980s. The 1970s and 1960s follow as the next two most favored decades. Totaling only 11% together, songs from 1990s and 2000s trail the other three decades. And finally, nothing from the 2010s or later makes the playlist.

One can conclude that as time progressed, Wallace’s familiarity with contemporary music waned. And in 2010, Ed gave up trying. This is a shame, because there are gems to be heard. For example, the following number from the 2020s:

Chaise Longue by Wet Leg.
Released: 2021 June 15

[chorus]
“On the chaise longue, on the chaise longue
On the chaise longue, all day long, on the chaise longue
On the chaise longue, on the chaise longue
On the chaise longue, all day long, on the chaise longue”

Today’s music can be just as prescient as songs of old. For example, the chorus of 2021’s Chaise Longue foretells Wallace’s likely future endeavor once his car shilling ends.

And sometimes old songs can be updated to address contemporary events, such as with a new chorus for Don McLean’s 1971 single American Pie.

The Year Music Died

Why, why, Master Obvious guy
Do the new songs make you wanna cry?
Since 2010 he never gave them a try
Griping "That'll be the year music died
That'll be the year music died"

And for a refresher on the original chorus, the following music video is submitted for your approval.

To conclude, Wallace acts as if the music died in 2010. But what happened is that the music industry oligarchs no longer possess all of the best material. And that material is no longer played in heavy rotation amongst a handful of outlets. Instead, one must seek out the good tunes. So, it was really only Wallace’s persistence and creativity that died in 2010.

-- UPDATE (2024 AUGUST 10) --

Having likely concluded making corrections and updates to the guide itself, the charts and tables of its analysis have been updated accordingly. Only one notable metric was affected by these updates. With his song count rising from four songs to five, Bryan Adams now solely holds third place within the ranking of performers with the most songs used as a Wheels bumper. AC/DC, David Bowie, Van Halen and ZZ Top fall to sharing fourth place, with a count of four songs each.

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2023 September 30 / 2024 August 10 - Guide to the Bumpers of Wheels on 570 KLIF (NOV, 2022 to MAY, 2024)